I don’t know what’s going on of late. When I was a kid going to Bar Mitzvah’s and such there were never hora accidents. People went up in a chair, they were bandied around a bit and then they came back down. Simple tradition. And with the exception of getting your toes stepped on pretty regularly – it was fun.
Recently, I’ve seen a number of hora accidents – including one bride getting tipped over and dumped head first right out of her chair from 7 feet up. And we’re talking landing on her head. Nothing kills a good hora like dumping a bride. She was a real trooper and got right back in that chair and went up again. But it had the possibility of being really ugly.
So in an effort to save everyone from the pain and embarrassment of dumping their honoree – here are the rules of lifting someone in a chair during the hora.
1. Lend a hand. Guys, it’s your responsibility. You don’t have to be Jewish to pick up the chair. And you don’t have to be a bodybuilder. Don’t stand around wondering if you’re going to get called on to participate – help. You need at least six or eight guys of average strength per chair. Preferably two per leg.
2. Get a decent chair. Never use a folding chair. It really should be a chair with with arms. If there are no arms, consider having your honoree straddling the chair and hold the back. Note: Moms don’t want to straddle chairs nor do most brides. Go look harder for an arm chair. Hopefully someone thought this through before the music started…
3. Keep the chair tilted back slightly at all times. Never let the chair tip forward or to the side. This means that the people holding the rear legs can’t lift the chair as high as the guys in the front. Pretty simple concept but pay attention to it.
4. Don’t overbounce. It’s a celebration, not a mosh pit. This is not an opportunity to show off your strength. Don’t let a couple of cocktails make you an overeager bouncer.
5. Watch out for overhead items. Don’t put the chair in the center of the dance floor if there’s a low hanging chandelier there. Ouch.
6. Slowly put down the back legs of the chair first keeping the same level of tilt that you had above. Guys, be sure you don’t let the chair leg snag your jacket or pants pocket on the way down.
7. Jew or gentile, if you’re not helping with the chair then you must sing. It doesn’t matter that you don’t really know the words. Few do in this country. But there’s only 14 words in the entire song. Learn to fake them with confidence. They are:
hava nagila
| Hava nagila |
הבה נגילה |
Let’s rejoice |
| Hava nagila |
הבה נגילה |
Let’s rejoice |
| Hava nagila ve nis’mecha |
הבה נגילה ונשמחה |
Let’s rejoice and be happy |
|
(repeat stanza once) |
|
| Hava neranenah |
הבה נרננה |
Let’s sing |
| Hava neranenah |
הבה נרננה |
Let’s sing |
| Hava neranenah ve nis’mecha |
הבה נרננה ונשמחה |
Let’s sing and be happy |
|
(repeat stanza once) |
|
| Uru, uru achim! |
!עורו, עורו אחים |
Awake, awake, brothers! |
| Uru achim b’lev sameach |
עורו אחים בלב שמח |
Awake brothers with a happy heart |
|
(repeat line four times) |
|
| Uru achim, uru achim! |
!עורו אחים, עורו אחים |
Awake, brothers, awake, brothers! |
| B’lev sameach |
בלב שמח |
With a happy heart |
The digraph ch is pronounced like the German ch after a back vowel, as in Bach.
OK, now let’s rejoice!